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NEWIES ALWAYS WELCOME: Have a BASH join the HASH. Just turn up 10 minutes before the START in your old running gear. SUNday startS 11.00 (SUMMER MONDAYs 19:30) Runs last about one hour.
WE ALWAYS FINISH TOGETHER. |
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Like to see more Hash Snaps? Visit the updated PHOTO GALLERY page for some of the best of 2006, 2007 & this year |
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Run No 875: The Millstream, Hitchin
Monday 12 May 2008
Hares: Gorjoyce &The Count
HASHERS: Quite a few considering
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What a fantastic run - even Pongo would have been delighted with it had he been there. Expertly crafted in the warm North Hertfordshire sunshine by the very same hares as last week's classic, nearly solo run and not at all bored by it were they. Not at all.
Donut was there and Private Parts ran through some water and Shagpile refused a numbered check. All pretty predictable really.
And the beer stop was a delight - just what we needed.
OK, hands up time. I am on the Sarajevo jaunt just a few hours after the run and can't be arsed to do the Wurdz post event so I've done them before.
But you wait and see.
They won't be far out.
See you in Bosnia?
Count Roadkill ..... for Beerstop Queen Gorjoyce |
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Run No 874: The North Star, Mardley Heath
Monday 5 May 2008
Hares: The Count and Gorjoyce
HASHERS: 6 APRES: 2
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Rapid ... 100% record
Lady Pee .... silly zooming
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Yes you read that right.
6.
I suppose there is a reason, 2 hashs in 2 days, and it's not the lowest ever - Underlay says she has known as few as 4 on a gawd-awful day in Reed many a year ago.
So what did they miss, the massed ranks of H5ers sat at home in front of the BarB?
Well, as it goes, a pretty super if uneventful (what did you expect?) run, bang on the hour, through some lovely woods and in smashing spring weather. Yes we ... the few ... enjoyed a great afternoon of exercise in the English countryside at it's best.
Leaving the pub, up the hill, we negotiated a somewhat affluent housing estate and Rapid Withdrawal came into his own as we climbed to Mardley Heath. Some sneaky haring was required to edge him into a falsie and give Forking Dickchair the chance to lead the small but perfectly formed pack towards Woolmer Green.
Numbered checks were potentially an issue although the hares had foreseen this and capped them at 4. Rapid made it easier by being two of the four. The other prob was in Harmergreen Wood where Mrs Forking would have loved the bluebells. There the Ladies Check relied somewhat on Lady Pee to get it right first time. When she didn't Donut had to pull his t-shirt down to his knees and use a high-pitched voice.
Shagpile and Underlay poled up after the event claiming to have cycled from Potton. Our innocent acceptance of this drew a full confession - they had driven down and cycled round the corner - although they didn't stick around to accept their punishment. Despite this the assistant RA achieved the rare distinction of awarding down-downs to everyone other than himself. Not a difficult task on this occassion but done with customary style by Rapid who nabbed Forking (silly false trail running), Lady P (silly camera zooming) and Donut (silly Front Running Ladyism).
On On to THE MILLSTREAM at Hitchin (19:30 on MONDAY) where we are offering the delights of a beer stop on the eve of Project Sarajevo.
Count Roadkill and Gorjoyce |
Mrs Forking would have loved the bluebells
Donut .. female impersonator??
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Run No 872: The Engineers Arms, Henlow
Sunday 27 April 2008
Hares: Screamer & Smiffo
HASHERS: 18 GROUPIES*: 3
* turned up to circle then burreged off |
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Pongo ... Good Crack
Capt F ... dry
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Where were they?? That dazzling duo of RA’s ?? Nowhere to be seen so the RAin put in an appearance instead! It started at 10:55 and finished at 12:05 just as all the intrepid hashers ..and harriets had retired to the pub for a well earned drink or three.
When the opening circle was called by DONUT we had been peppered with a few spots of RAin, well some of us had, most were sheltering under brollys. The GM announced that the books were open for run 888 (sign up soon or miss a great day out) and delegated the HMs to appoint a secret RA (so secret even the GM did not want to know who it was!!).
Lots of bars and long falsies contrived to see most of the Knitting circle become FRBs during the run. PONGO and SHAGPILE were first to a numbered check twice and on both occasions claimed an age exemption. PONGO was rewarded with the Good Crack award in the circle, which he wore with pride.
Down downs for the hares, SCREAMER (who chose green beer) and SMIFFO (who was comprehensively beaten when drinking dark mild). CAPT FANTASTIC was revealed as the secret RA and awarded thank you down downs to those who had helped him with dry clothes after the run. Oh and SHAGGY got a cider down down for ... ?. Then we retired to the pub to drink more beer (only 10 to choose from!!).
ON ON TO GREAT GRANSDEN on Sunday and
MARDLEY HEATH 16:00 BANK HOLIDAY MONDAY
Smiffo
WE ARE USING ARCHIVED SNAPS - OF ARCHIVED HASHERS - BECAUSE HASH FLASH WENT AWOL THIS WEEK
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Shagpile .. age exemption
Shaggy ... ? |
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White Rabbit was due to hare 870 but was involved in a car accident a few days before: as shown here, despite obvious discomfort she still turned up at the hash, had a laugh with us and made sure we were well fed.
It transpires she fractured her neck in that accident and is currently in Princes Ward of The QE2 hospital in Welwyn Garden City (due to be moved to the Royal Free hospital in Hampstead shortly). We wish our "Most-Run Hasher" the speediest of recoveries and look forward to seeing her back in the circle very soon.
Scribe, 24/4/08 |
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Run No 871: The George IV, Baldock
Sunday 20 April 2008
Hares: Airscrew & Donut
HASHERS: 22 ANKLE BITERS: 2 MUTTS: 1 |
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"Lost yer Dragon mate?" ...
..."I left her around here somewhere"
Knobber, back with Marathon yarns
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After miserable weather numbers could have been thin on the ground; but 21 made the circle at the George IV where watching Nik Nak park was the highlight, taking over the mantle from White Rabbit and covering two spaces. Trulli being off sick meant only one Hare, but as always a map was prep’d and Donut stepped in. There was also a good turn out for St George’s Day; with a mixture of Red and White, plus a little Australian…. In the circle, the hash were told that they crossed London Road twice; once as we left the pub and again over a pedestrian crossing: but which one Flo?
The pack duly set off across London Road, towards Baldock town. The Count quickly found the false off the first check and so the pack proceeded straight on to a check where Capt F called on, but went past the T, before being called back. The next check was for the ladies and Flo upon seeing a pedestrian crossing chose to check it out even though there was no trail…. she was called back as this wasn’t The Crossing.
Racing ahead were Hairy Gusset and Mekon, asked at the next check how they got there so fast – local knowledge was the reply. A ‘4 to the back’ check was ignored…and so it was into the field led by Capt F. This left the Hare puzzled as he hadn’t laid any trail in the field, what was he following? The pack was called back and made their way up Willian Road to a bar. OverWallahflo then led the pack up a footpath and into fields. The trail took the pack to the edge of the A1, but not before a 6 to the back caught the front runners, realising that 6 hadn’t caught enough, a 2 and a 1 were hastily laid. The 1 caught Rapid Withdrawal – who vowed to get the Hare back one day…
After a rest at a held check, the pack followed a false before the real trail took them to a veterans check. Pongo and Dead Meat ambled off down the track, but the pack chose to run the other way, which was a shame as that led to two false trails The pack caught up Dead Meat and Pongo, before running into a bar. It was then down dog sh*t alley to an ‘Whole Pack to the Back’ marker. At the end of the alley, a ladies check greeted the pack. Flo said she always ran the false so started her way up Weston Way and funnily enough a T greeted her. The pack was then led into the estate, where Flo and Nik Nak, realising they had reached an H check as front runners for the first time, stopped to pose for photos from Hash Flash.
The on was called along the edge of Tesco’s Car Park before making their way across the Pedestrian Crossing (yes the correct one Flo). The pack split in to L and S, but not much time was saved as the pack re-grouped around the corner and was told by the Hare to stay on the right hand side of the road, but that led them to a bar.…on the real route the FRBs were caught with a ‘6 to the back’ once they reached the brow of a hill.
The pack then entered the maze of paths at the top of Weston Hill. With multiple T’s and Bars up a steep climb a bench to rest weary legs was solace for some. Then Giblets did the honours and ran an obvious false, straight up the hill; the pack not so patriotic went the other way and, smelling beer, found the real route through the woods. Mekon chose to run her own route but caught up at V check in the car park. The pack together it was across the road and through the trees to a maze of paths. Giblets called the On Inn and, as trees thinned, the pub appeared. Past the pony and over the barbed wire before entering the Beer Garden via a small gate (of which more later)
Down-downs for The Hares – Airscrew and Donut. The RA, Rapid, took exception to Airscrew bragging that “the first one of the morning is always perfect, it goes downhill from there” (referring to circular check signs of course), to Nik Nak - who didn’t bring the balls with her or stay for the circle (her day will come) and to Wallah for failing to kill a pigeon as well as being Australian so near to St George's Day. Giblets had a drink for his 47th Birthday and another for crossing the watchful RA. And of course Pongo and Dead Meat for the ‘effort’ in opening and closing the Beer Garden gate.
A special down down was given to Knobber for completing the London Marathon.
On On to the Engineers Arms at Henlow Airscrew and Donut |
Wallah doesn't get the hang of this St George thing
A shy pair of Held-Check Virgins
RA has that Gotcha look
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Run No 870: The Offley Recreation Centre
Sunday 13 April 2008
Hares: Bangers 'n' Madge & FDC
HASHERS: 18 ANKLE BITERS: 2 MADGE: 1 |
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The North Face of Birkitt Hill
RA explains "The Chaos Theory of Circles"
Madge has down-down in "20 Run Award"
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On the day before the Hash the hares got together. ‘This route is a bit long’ said Forking Dickchair to White Rabbit, ‘This bit through the Isle of Dogs for a start will have to go, and you can’t lay a run with a two hour five minute finish’. There on a table was a bottle that said ‘drink me’ and this potion was hastily down-downed. As if by magic the route suddenly shrunk and in a cloud of sausages Bangers and Madge appeared to help the hares.
On the day of the hash Forkings’ shorts spoke; ‘To help all the hasher find this hidden venue I shall make a sign’ and promptly strung themselves in the car park for all to see. One of the first to arrive was Captain Fantaaaastic on his bicycle. The circle was formed and set off to seek the route. About a couple of hundred yards up the road Nik Nak was seen gaining an unfair advantage over everyone by parking in the Red Lion pub. Now all together the pack was led by Donut into the countryside where there were lambs, bluebells and a pack of white deer spotted. Many a false route was found and Pongo complemented the R.A. on the beautiful weather and scenery he had laid on. There was a lady check which Flo, Screamer and Lady Pee checked out. Having reached the fields on the side of the A505 to Hitchin it was time for a juvenile check. This was carried out with the enthusiasm of a baggage handler at Terminal 5 as Splitblox, Munchkin and Air Con reluctantly trooped down the false trails.
Soon an ultimatum was reached when it was making your mind up time for the short cutters, led by Mekon to sample the village sights of Offley. The running pack followed Rapid Withdrawal, Smiffo and Count Roadkill who set off down the downhill bit, closely followed by a steep uphill climb of the north face of Birkitt Hill. Five Bah was later heard to shout ‘On Inn’ and the hashers assembled about the fine spread that White Rabbit had laid on in the Offley Recreation Centre. The pack then sat in the bar watching the big screen T.V. trying to spot Knobber in the mêlée of the London Marathon.
At the circle up there was a surprise 20 runs award to Madge who wore her new designer jacket and took her down-down well as most of the above for a string of misdemeanours from bingo calling, kissing gate propositioning and gayness in the hash. I am sure that all of us will be wishing White Rabbit a speedy recovery to the terrible injuries she is suffering and that she will return when better.
On-on to the Saint Georges run at the George IV Baldock
FDC
Congratulations to Knobber who completed the Isle of Dogs version of Run 870 (aka The London Marathon) in a new record time for a non-competitive former H5 RA from Stotfold. |
Job done ... by back Hare
Pongo .... 100% Hash Man
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Run No 869: The Stag, Stotfold
Sunday 6 April 2008
Hares: Knobber & Hairy Gussett
HASHERS: 11 ANKLE BITERS: 3 MUTTS: 1 |
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Aaah the ducklings ....
.... respect the horses ...
... and beware the petrol
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As the weather forecast is always wrong, the Hares took no notice about the prospect of snow, and laid the trail using white flour. So they were slightly concerned when the trail was camouflaged by a thick white covering the next day, but in reality it didn’t matter as hardly anyone turned up probably because of the snow.
But, as the snow disappeared, slowly as the temperature rose, and quickly as SAS and Bowser threw it at each other, the trail was revealed again. However, this didn’t bring out any more Hashers, so off we went with the limited numbers. Scooper found the first false trail and on the way came across Martin, the small stray cat that adopts anyone who will accommodate him. We were hoping that he would join us and make up the numbers, but he disappeared on a falsie of his own underneath a fence.
The trail was heading through the streets and along alleys down to the mills, common and riverside, as usual for a Stotfold run, but as the pack reached the Chequers the trail took a turn back southwards, past the dreadful new houses and up to New Bridge on Baldock Road. The pack dwelled there while it gathered and passed the time looking at the big fishes in the river. Airscrew found the trail through the woods, over the bypass and over the field to a 5 to the back check. Then off through more woodland and through a horse field to a check where SAS, Scrummy and Airscrew ran up the hill to find a bar at the top and a T in the farmyard on the way back. Meanwhile, the rest of the pack had gone down the hill to the duck pond to see the ducklings and be hissed at by the swans.
From there, the pack ran on its instincts and followed the “Footpath to Stotfold” sign, through the farm and into more woodland before splitting with Five Baah and Airscrew heading for home, several taking a route in the wrong direction, and the knitting circle/crèche slowly heading up the marked trail with the back Hare. After Knobber had put the pack back on the right trail, a quick count by the Quick Count determined that the pack was 3 down, being Airscrew and Five Baah having gone ahead (but both failed to return from the 7 to the back check), and Lady Pee, who had disappeared into the undergrowth for a minute.
Back up the track to the underpass, where we did not see Wendy this time (should have remembered that she wanted to run with us next time), and then a cut round the back of the High Street to the On Inn and the pub. As some couldn’t stay for the circle, it became an octagon and looked strange when there were four in the middle for misdemeanors such as stroking pussies (sex on the Hash).
So a nice quiet, social run through snowy countryside and taking in plenty of wildlife before returning to a decent boozer with 4 good real ales on tap and a couple of cracking jokes from the GM. And not a dog turd in sight all the way.
ON ON to Offley ......... or The London Marathon for Knobber
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Snow fun for SAS .......
... when Bowser and RA take revenge
Scrummy Dumps behind Airscrew
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